


The Fuck Files

by shadowblade_tara



Series: This is Sabotage [2]
Category: Transformers - All Media Types
Genre: Characters to be added, Multi, Not to be taken seriously, Tags to be added, excessive amounts of swearing, tik tock jokes, writing prompts
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-24
Updated: 2020-10-24
Packaged: 2021-03-09 06:02:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 589
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27178957
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shadowblade_tara/pseuds/shadowblade_tara
Summary: Collection of writing prompts all centering around the ops teams and the word 'fuck'. Viewer discretion advised.
Relationships: Hound/Mirage (Transformers), Jazz/Prowl
Series: This is Sabotage [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1265111
Comments: 6
Kudos: 64





	The Fuck Files

**In the early days of the war:**

If there's one thing Jazz absolutely hates, it's patrol duty.

He's spec ops in training. Patrol duty is boring, and Jazz has never been one to handle boredom easily. He usually keeps in contact with Mirage, another trainee, during his patrols, but this time rumor has Soundwave in the area. Comms are down until one of the other teams can confirm or deny those rumors.

Damn it.

He's been out for a good hour by the time he sees it. 

The warehouse district on the outskirts of Kaon are not an easy place to hide, especially not as a Seeker sitting on top of the frelling warehouse. Jazz just stands there, a few alleys over and appropriately hidden, and shrugs.

Ah, what the hell. He's bored, anyway.

"What's yer name!"

The Seeker's head snaps up, but he can't quite lock on to Jazz's location. "Starscream!" he yells back.

In for a bit, as the saying goes.

"Fuck ya, Starscream!"

The Seeker bristles, drawing himself up to full height and flaring out his wings. "What's your name?!"

No harm in being honest. "Jazz!"

"Fuck you, Jazz!"

Jazz can't help it - he almost starts laughing. Maybe he can make this even more interesting? "Ya see that warehouse over there?"

"Which warehouse!"

"Ya see it?"

"Yeah?"

"Ah built that warehouse!"

"So?"

"An' Ah fucked yer creator in it!"

With a howl of rage, Starscream transforms and takes flight. Jazz is quick to duck into the shadows, laughing hysterically the entire time as he makes his escape.

At least this patrol was more interesting than most.

**Present day:**

Optimus has to admit - it's good to be back on Cybertron.

It's even better to be back in Iacon, with the former Decepticon SIC by his side and helping rebuild their people. 

They're standing together in the Hall of Iacon, watching the former Autobots and Decepticons file in to begin their new lives. Optimus smiles. "This is good." he says.

"It is." Starscream agrees. "Without Megatron, negotiations have been going much smoother."

"I appreciate you helping with that." Prime says. "I almost expected you to try to take over his position."

Starscream shakes his head. "Nah. One of the reasons I wanted his position was to try to stop the war. I would have tried to fight it through, but still." Optimus has to chuckle at the tone.

Jazz and Prowl walk in, followed by the rest of the team, and suddenly Starscream grins.

"Sorry about this."

"About what?"

Starscream cups his hands around his mouth and shouts loud enough to be heard across the room.

"WHAT IS YOUR NAME?"

Jazz's head snaps up, and he smirks.

"JAZZ!"

"FUCK YOU, JAZZ!"

"WHAT'S YER NAME?"

"STARSCREAM!"

"FUCK YA, STARSCREAM!"

Optimus hides his face in his hands, but nothing can hide his shoulders shaking with laughter. The ops team keeps exchanging confused but vastly amused looks, and the exchange just keeps going.

"YOU SEE THAT ROOM?"

"DON'T YA BRING MAH CREATOR INTO THIS!"

"YOU SEE IT!"

"DON'T YA DO IT!"

"I BUILT THAT ROOM! AND THEN I FUCKED YOUR CREATOR IN IT!"

The two mechs then promptly dissolve into laughter. Prowl looks up at Optimus and gestures at Jazz helplessly. 

"I don't get it!"

"You're the one who bonded him!" Optimus calls back.

Prowl just stares at Jazz until the mech gets his wind back. "What was that about?" he asks mildly.

Jazz flashes him a grin. "Would ya believe Ah have an inside joke with Screamer?"

"Now I will."


End file.
